17.0515-0900 Anerobia

@24.1026-1228.40atx (orig)

@24.1027-2126.18atx - this is too dense and/or preachy. TONE IT DOWN

@24.1121-1032.32atx

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　　Dear Marla,

　　I mentioned to James the other night that I felt I am just drifting aimlessly in my life. Oh, as a Rubberist, It feels good. Sensual pleasures are abundant. But, there is no substance to it. I am stagnating in that life. There is no direction to it. It's all just hedonism. I'm just waiting for my death (several decades from now, I hope).

　　James likes the word "goal".

　　Yesterday he just asked me, flat out, what my "goal" is.

　　I couldn't answer him at first. I didn't know.

　　"Is your fetish, somehow, one of your goals? If your fetish could speak, what would she want?"

　　"Oh, OK. That helps," I blurted out, "I think 'she' would want me to be ~100% enclosed in latex, ~100% of the time. That's always in the back of my mind."

　　He frowned and asked,"Are her goals important to you? Are you accomplishing any of them?"

　　I had never thought about this. Hmmmm....

　　"Yes, they are important," I answered. "She's always been the 'roomate in my mind' since childhood. She comandeered my sexuality at an early age and has been a stable lover and mistress ever since."

　　"A mistress? Do you talk her?" Asked James.

　　"Well, maybe not verbally. I think we comunicate more in a language of fantasy dreams and 'urges'. She is the alpha with the bizarre, delicious desires that my body must delightfully endure. This is all strictly at a hedonistic, physical sensation level, however. She's all about pleasure and endorphins, not love and oxytocin. There is no emotional attachment between us and never has been. It's sort of like how you might think of, say, your thumb -- it's a part of your physical presence, not something separate."

　　James enquired, "And she wants you to do that '100%/100%' thing -- what do you call it?"

　　"Deep Rubber ".

　　"Are you doing Deep Rubber?"

　　"No. Not really."

　　James looked me in the eye. "Why not? It's what you want, isn't it?"

　　I stammered. "Full blown ~100%/~100% is not even close to being possible in the real world. It's easy to get to the 100% coverage for short periods of time. The hard part is doing it 100% of the time. It's brutal. The longest I've worn a latex suit in one stretch is about 3 days -- and even then I had to padlock it on me, otherwise I would have taken it off long before then. Latex becomes itchy and tiresome after a day or two. A sort of grinding, 'sensu-sexual exhaustion' sets in. Besides, I rarely get to 100% enclosure. The suit had openings in the latex for my eyes, mouth and ponytail, which brings it down to ~96%. Each ~1 inch hole is 1%."

　　"Wow! You have this all figured out!", said James mirthfully.

　　"Oh, I've had a lifetime to think about it," I responded. "Thinking in terms of a numerical indicator of enclosure is oftern useful, especially when I am trying to envision how much I am actually fulfilling the ~100/~100% mandate."

　　"Besides, there is no place in the world where I can be ~100%/~100%. There No matter where I am, there will always be people around that will require an aerobic presence."

　　"Aerobic presence?" Asked James, somewhat skeptically.

　　"It just means 'with air'. You know -- like aerobic excercises -- from Latin 'aer' = 'air' -- lots of breathing. I use the word to refer to when I'm not covered in latex and am fully exposed to the air as you are now, James. The opposite of that is 'anaerobic', which refers to a lack of air, such as when one is fully enclosed in latex. It's spelled just like aerobic but has the negating, 'an' prefix added." Then I chuckled lightly and said, "It's really a fun word. I remember somebody on one of my online forums called himself 'Anaerobe'. What a perfect name for a Deep Rubberist!"

　　I continued, "Of course, the biggest problem is all the social stigma about being 'perverted'. That especially applies to me because I am old and not not much to look at in latex. Deep Rubber is spooky because it is , well, 'deep'. Ideally, it helps people understand that there is an insanely wide diversity of sexual orientations in our species. In reality, having a fetish is the kind of thing that, even barely 100 years ago, could be fuel for lynch mobs. Society won't let me take the deep dive into Deep Rubber that my heart has always wanted. "

　　James sat upright in his chair and looked at me quizzically. "Where are you living right now," he asked, almost rhetorically...

　　I wasn't sure what he was getting at. "Uh, I live here with you and Lorraine at the Hahnestery? "

　　"And why do we call it the 'Hahnestery'?" He was obviously leading me toward something.

　　Oh, I see where he is going with that. "Because it is like a monastery, right?"

　　"Exactly. A 'monastery' is place where someone can devote all his life to One purpose (i.e. 'mono') and do it with a minimum of diversions and distractions," he replied. Then he added, "a monastery does not have to be religious -- it can be based on any unifying principle that holds the bretheren together. The important things are that each aspirant, nun, monk, or nunk has their own single, monolithic life goal, a specific mountain to climb. They also must have a quiet place, free from interruptions, in which to practice and work toward their individual goals."

　　"Thalia, you can do your Deep Rubbering here, if you want. Why not become a 'Deep Rubber Monastic' here at the Hahnestery to tackle the ~100%/~100% challenge? At the very least, I find everything about your fetish refreshingly fascinating, although I have no inclinations toward rubber for myself. Lorry still has a small, kinky streak of loving schadenfreude and is interested in becoming lightly involved in your fetish. She thought you might sometimes need help with dressing in your gear and that sort of thing. Hey! Maybe she could become an 'assistant' to your fetish.

　　Besides, that means that I'd even have to cover my face to get to 100%